The Grub

The almost transparent white grub moves
slowly along the edge of the frying pan.
the grease makes the only sound, loud
in the empty room. Even the rim is cooking him.
The worm stops. raises his head slightly.
Lowers it, moving tentatively down the side.
He seems to be moving on his own time,
but he is falling by definition. He moves forward
touching the frying grease with his whole face.

Linda Gregg

Convertible Deliberations


Louis Seigal and Erika Lutzner collaborated on Convertible Deliberations, the first of several photo essays on topics such as movement, stasis, color, texture, and how they interact within constraints of the natural world, or by the lens of a camera, or perhaps by the mind itself.

Convertible Deliberations originated with the idea of water; how it transforms itself and takes on new shapes like a snake shedding her skin.  Water is vapor rising, ice melting, turning grey in the twilight of slush—

a lone snowflake leucous in the light,

later, puddles of dingy impurities, this transformation of liquid to solid, gaseous, vapor—steam, what does it mean?

This essay attempt to reflect on that…

Leave you with questions, the next time you look at a lake, a puddle, an ice cube, notice

how they are similar and no two are alike

Louis Seigal has been living photography as long as he can remember.  Always more comfortable with a lens to hide behind, he found that he has a gift for viewing the world through a frame at a different angle than most see.  He has the unique ability to see things that many miss.  His photographs encapsulate worlds within worlds. He notices the most minute details and allows us to see their beauty. Whether an icicle, a child’s smile, a raindrop among thousands, or a daisy standing at attention, Louis captures the essence of meaning through color, texture and most important, his patience and views of the subjects he photographs, bring us into his world.

 

Space


Mars, Jupiter, Pluto
looking 
below from above—

Big Bang 

         boom 
                    boom


lichen flash
nictitating nebula

             boom                     

                     boom





Blistering



            
          
behind 

  crystalline 

                    disguises

obscure              

                    harmonies

in        
the            
                     voice
 of

        a 
                              siren’s 
                        
                                             call



Artifice



Illusive illusions—
       droplet of water
appear as animals
          refraction of light
on lens of camera
         from screen bouncing
off window = art



Slick


Orgiastic droplets
dripping

making liquid
love

on hood of
car



Lake


Swirling eddies
drooling   in   circular
motion, each one robotically
indifferent

to the next





Mosaic

 

blue cracked
glass covered

by blankets of
alabaster powder—

viridians and crimsons
encased in icy prisons



Beaded



Effervescent
                      bubbles  
     
       planning their
            
                         escape—

imprisoned

by
a
wall
         
          impenetrable
                                  impossibilities




Aurelian


chaos
crystal
blizzards
patinas
of
a
moon

mysterious
sepias
coined
from
Celan’s
image
sculpted out of ashes
found
in a field of
poppies and remembrance

longing in the color of
snuff colored dust
liquid madness
all illusionary
hope is not attainable


J. Hope Stein


SOMEWHERE BETWEEN
the collar 

of your navy
pea coat 

and your clumsy
hair

the crescent
of your neck
moons me 

between white lace sheets
a blizzard

two storms move across
sky

to meet over new york city one night
in 1888 with bare hands              

i saw you somewhere the way you see someone you know on television                                   
eating whipped butter spread

somewhere your messy
untied shoelaces
 
somewhere puddles

between moon and mantle
they buried you
somewhere in my baseball cap

somewhere your sideburns climb the brain between your thoughts 
with bare hands

between fingers between buttons between snowflakes big as bulbs                       
we share a monster somewhere a wall
 
somewhere the poem becomes a train becomes a moon

         the close watch of the clock somewhere—
         women in sequins and buckles, men in
         pleated yokes and coattails twirling and
         kissing between the hands of the clock
         we were drinking and twirling and blowing
         kisses towards something we didn’t fully
         understand
 
somewhere two storms make monster over new york city
between fingers between buckles
 
I wet your paper plate
with the lawn hose out back
 
somewhere your bony
back—the muscles of the city motionless
 
         yes, I saw them fall
         yes, I was somewhere on canal street— I was late for a meeting
         no, I forgot the time, I didn’t realize anyone was inside
         no, I couldn’t run my pants were too long—no, my heels were too high
 
on a subway between church and chambers
i think to bowtie your shoelaces
 
between
left and right
 
between your left
handedness
 
and your proclivity
towards paper cuts
 
your pen exploded
ink
 
puddles
your shirt pocket 
 
splatters somewhere
between east and neck
 
again in the space
between the backs of your ears






CONFLICTS WITH MASTER #1

First, it was cherry pits and pork chop bones
in the bed sheets.

Then, an opened can of soup with the mushrooms picked
out and laid across the bed—

Sometimes we are asleep, but technically we are awake. Dolphins
for example, sleep one hemisphere at a time.


She caught him in the act, (not the violent masturbating, that started much later)
when she awoke in the shriek of night to find him crying –here,
kitty, kitty at the edge
of the bed chewing
raw bacon and cigarettes
or rummaging the neighbors’
homes for stale licorice and coffee filters chanting 
“God Bless America”.

From that point on she took
matters into her own hands:

(ladies, here’s how to keep a man—)

Push the love seat.

Push the sofa.

Push the cherry book case.

Push the walnut coffee table (which belonged to your mother)

Push the kitchen table.

Disconnect the TV and PUSH.

PUSH. volumes
of history books & board games.

In the early morning, when she slipped back into bed beside him, she would
sometimes find teeth marks in the mattress and pillowcases –

He had been dreaming what he always dreams:  He is a large cat circling a
zookeeper with a bucket of raw meat.




ADDIE POLK, 90

When he heard a loud noise come from Addie’s house,  A neighbor 
used a ladder to enter the second story bathroom.  At first, he assumed
the long-barreled handgun on the bed was for protection. Then he saw
the red— “Oh, no. Miss Polk musta done shot herself.” Downstairs, 
in the home Addie and her late husband lived in for 37 years:  Addie’s 
car keys, Addie’s wristwatch, Addie’s pocketbook, Addie’s policy 
laid out across the antique table with blue trim.  The notes the deputies
had been leaving always disappeared, though Addie had never come 
to the door when they rang.





MARVIN SCHUR 

 

World War II veteran,
survivor of the Great 
Depression

found stiff. 
Man, 93—

The coroner said:
I’ve done hundreds of these, 
never seen someone freeze 
inside their home.

Bay City Electric 
Light and Power 
sent notice via mail. 

On the kitchen table:  
a utility bill clipped
to a large amount of money.






J. Hope Stein is studying at New England College.
 

Alexandra Isacson


The Nightmare

She drifts on sea sofa                                              
rides unconscious desire-                                                  
Fuseli’s luminous mare 
hypnotizes with psychic lines. 

Her heart hums in silk petal gown  
splashes through paint pulses-  
wind gallops in electric ice vapors, 
tangling synaptic hair and mane.

Reflections on flaming lake
smolders in broken mirrors.  
 
She wants to stay; the mare rears-
turns the heavy breathed air.
The double evaporates into 
ether huffed handkerchief.
 
She wakes with electrifying jolt-
Freud will not look at her,
infused with indigo smoke
takes notes- spills white powder
on her liquid gown & writes her script
they will meet tomorrow for hours.

 

 

Electra’s Stockings

Every time she went to Queens, she took the subway to see this middle-aged guy
in Astor Place at his brownstone stocking shop.  She stilettoed past the vintage
clothing shops, tattoo and piercing places.  She visited him in lieu of coconut soup
and vegetables in the Indian food district.  She didn't even need stockings; her
mirrored heirloom armoire at home overflowed with the extravagances she had
bought: lace, seamed, sheers, regular, and thigh highs.

From the busy street, she spiraled down the stairs. Hearing his voice, she was
swept up in oceanic memory, an archeology of embedded layers, feeling as
though she was drifting in the Atlantic off Coney Island.   
 
Downstairs, his thick Bronx accent resonated deep within her.  He liked to talk as
much as he liked selling stockings.  He said he had to get out of his rent-stabilized
apartment because the walls were closing in on him, and she selected some lace
garters.  He missed the smut in New York since Mayor Giuliani had cleaned
everything up.  She laid some white stockings printed with black crosses on the
counter.  He flashed some fresh black fishnets and she heard a siren coming from
somewhere inside herself.

 

Carmel by the Sea

In another life, I was a mermaid.  At first, I thought it was a dream, but not a
chance with my glistening sheen.  I didn’t even have to shake my verdigris tail or
my wet, polished tresses to be every sailor’s fantasy.  For them, it must have been
the complexity of Oedipus, since I nursed the orphaned starfish at my breasts.  

In this life, I live in the mist and rush of undulating waves in my barnacled
bungalow.  The migrating Monarchs visit my succulent gardens and windswept
cypress, and the barking harbor seals and lions bask on the sloshed rocks.  

I cast sea spells for the women here, sculpting mouth blown fantasies and sea
fineries.  I stitch together dresses corseted with bleached seagull bone, knotted
and woven with blue jay wings and dyed with a splash of oceanic ink; and
stranded pearls from the ruffled clams.  I read the past and future in spirit bottles
stained with iridescent messages imprinted deep within the belly of the earth’s
consciousness.  And at night by moon gleam, I slip out of myself into the
glittering gown of the sea, rising in the ocean’s shell to become Venus incarnate
for Botticelli.  






Alexandra's prose and poetry currently appears in Wilderness House Literary Review, FRiGG, Pank, Dogzplot, keepgoing.org., poeticdiversity, Eclectica, Fickle Muses, Slow Trains; and forthcoming in Dogzplot Flash Fiction Anthology 2009.   You can visit her here: alexandraisacson.com

Tiberius F


Where The Board Walk Ends

The strong shells of full-grown crabs
Are no match for
A five ton pickup truck.

 
Waves swell, crash, and flail,
Then return quietly,
Never having left at all. 

 
Caravans of clouds
Pass by quickly, 
In no particular hurry.


Moses parts seas.
Jesus walks on water. 
I spread your lips, dive right in. 
 
 
Your legs spread open,
Your wrists and ankles bound,
I fuck you as I please.





Tiberius F grew up in the wilds of the Northeast. He studied philosophy, spirituality and people; finding that he had a gift for helping people in various ways. He is intense, funny, a merrymaker, a charmer, and never boring, his laugh alone will give you pleasure beyond your dreams...

J. P. Dancing Bear


Gacela of the Inner Givens 
for Molly Gaudry

no one ever says the right thing in your sleep
of midnight blue and black stars.
No one can say the single word
that makes your colors want to sing.

A hundred brushstrokes of Persian blue
and green shifts in the window of your brow. 
You want someone to push your cloudy hair, 
watch the colors of your face—the slipping 

of orange to magenta to yellow to crimson. 
Your eyelids have a blue song tattooed on them. 
You say the word satellite in sleep. Behind 
your forehead someone prepares the seed 

of the moon. She has grown it into a body—
yours. She conjures sap and blood. 
She holds it in the cup of her hand, 
and offers it to you without words.

 

 

Gacela of a Redwing Blackbird
for Peter Conners

It is only a blackbird singing
at the orange remnants of the moon.
You say not to believe the song—
there is no dead of night, only the long

body of stars, mirroring our own.
Do not believe what the poets say—
the night is not cruel. Love is a blackbird
wing, small heart upon its sleeve.

What the blackbird sees of the night—
those impossible crumbs shining brightly;
that orange worm taunting the horizon.
You know what's true: the night is a blackbird

song sung with that hunger known to be
empty as the black space between stars.
You stretch out your wings, o red sleeve
heart, O blackbird fly at the starry spiral wing.

 

 


The Moment Before Waking 
for Brianna Noll

your hand is hovering above the small creature that has come to see what you are: it has a life of its own: even though it is clearly the hand you were born with: everything else is your hair: taking on different forms: grass: leaves: the bark and the blossoms: another creature begins to lead you away by a lock: something else has wrapped a nest out of your eddies and tides: you want to pet the little visitor: but like children: you are not sure how the gesture will be received: beyond all this: light is becoming music: wispy reeds and high strings: it’s haunting and unfamiliarly familiar: like seeing your own hair or hand in places you’ve never been

 

 

J. P. Dancing Bear is the author nine collections of poetry, most recently, Conflicted Light (SalmonPoetry, 2008).  His poems have been published in DIAGRAM, No Tell Motel, Verse Daily and others.  He is editor for the American Poetry Journal and Dream Horse Press.  His next book, Inner Cities of Gulls is due out by SalmonPoetry in 2010.

Sally Ashton


Lizard

The gray-brown lizard so handsomely marked appears on a speckled rock, a movement out from shadow. Flash—freeze. Hot—cold. What the fuck are you doing here he asks the lady in the bathing suit. She sits on another rock nearby but can’t hear him. He one-eyes her. And what you looking at? The absurd woman studies him, his poise and pose, then gazes again at the river cut deep in its gorge among boulders. Sparse brush and oak. Blue span above. The rush and tumble of it. Her wet bathing suit. The lizard squats, thin fingers splayed on a rock. He too stares. Into distances. For a long time. The water’s roar. A suspended light. He cocks his head and licks something from the rock. I love my life he says.

 

 


I wait for a rogue wave

I wait for a rogue wave to hit or a seagull to shit in my hair, what it means to sit on a rock near unprecedented sea, the sea that sounds like itself and nothing else in the world at the edge of the world where the waves change themselves against cliff. Here comes another woman down the same path, silent because of the self-sounding sea. Who isn’t obvious, only where and when. She hops the stream that barely troubles the surf. Next I look, she sits naked on the sand with a flame between her legs. This sounds like sex but it’s pages she burns, not self or passion though that’s implied. I can’t bear to watch nor should I. Watch. One who waits for birdshit must not interfere with one who self-emoliates. Instead I pocket two stones, one smooth, one jagged like an arrowhead and climb back up the cliff careful at each pitched step. 

And look back where one at a time each page torn out goes up in flame, each page a prayer. I don’t pray, such unbinding the loosening of thought, an unbodiment of desire. How is a mystery and why can’t be spoken. Even what fools the eye. Only fuel, smoke rising in a pillar, my lips flecked with salt.

 

 

How To

Don’t waste a feeling. Or a story. Or a way or worry. A minute. A birdsong. Not even one shade of green. Promise the crows anything. Remember the turkey vultures, how all spring they return one by one at dusk to roost in the eucalyptus trees. Also consider the privet that readies new berries so the seasons will continue outside the window. Write a Carte Geographique  de la Lune—nothing more sublime can be written in English nor more shadowed with desire, nor more unsayable. That it has not been said enough, even water mouths its lonely syllable. It stutters across the sea and lays cool hands over a lake. Don’t mention it anymore someone will tell you. But how can you compress the horizon or keep it from its risings? It will leer or loom or drift, a silver eyelash, a miniscule crack, an irresistible opening you long to enter. What else is there to know? So much spills out and over. And the ceiling fan spins slow. The spider in its corner spins a secret and the atoms in every part of everything spin, spin the little wheels of our hearts, spin beauty and its waning, the spider’s finely wrought bundle silent, wound with  silken thread.

in memory of Pat O’Laughlin

 

 

Sally Ashton is editor of the DMQ Review, an online journal. She is author of These Metallic Days, Mainstreet Rag, and Her Name Is Juanita, Kore Press 2009. Poetry and reviews have recently appeared in Sentence, Linebreak, Parthenon West Review, Poet Lore and in the anthology, An Introduction to the Prose Poem. She blogs at www.poetryonastick.blogspot.com


Nin Andrews

Nice Pig

In first grade Mrs. Wilson taught us
to write our names in cursive.
We took turns going to the blackboard,
gripping the yellow chalk,
writing in large loopy letters.
Anna P. liked to write her name
in one long stream.
AnnaAnnaAnna.
Rhoda wrote her name once
and sat down.
Tommy was afraid to go to the board. 
He cried and picked his nose.
Ginny drew a dog after her name.
That’s my dog, she said. 
D-o-g.  
What a nice dog, Mrs. Wilson said.
Did everyone see Ginny’s nice dog?
She gave Ginny a gold star.
After I wrote my name, 
I drew a pig.
What’s that thing? Mrs. Wilson asked.
That’s my pig, I said.  
P-i-g.
Oh, she said. 
Is he a nice pig?  I asked. 

 

 

In the Operating Room 

The nurse stands over a girl.  She places a mask over her nose and mouth, and
says breathe.  The girl breathes.  She breathes in and in.  She inhales an
underground lake, the liquid dank and acrid.  The taste of darkness fills her
mouth and lungs.  She tries to stay afloat but is sucked down, the world above
her fading fast.  For days, weeks, years, she is far below.  Sometimes she is too
cold to move.  Some days she is swimming faster and faster through your veins,
her tail flipping inside your skin.  Her eyes blur with the speed.  A hook tears at
the back of her throat.  When she looks up, she sees a bird looking back at her.
He stands on one leg and cocks his head, first to one side, then the other.  He
watches, waiting for her to surface.  Breathe, the nurse says.  Please breathe.

 

 

 

The Afterlife

Maybe you think it’s simple. Like the difference between left and right.
Between dreams and the other life.  The one you like.  But yesterday I saw a car
run over a cyclist.  When I looked up, the sky went black.  A huge bird spread
across my sky.  No one knew my name, not even me.

What do you want?  God asked.  Nothing, I said.  But it was such a lie. I was
trying to be polite.  Maybe that’s why He sent me back here to try again, here in
this gap between one life and the next, between what you said and what I
meant.

Sometimes I say we have to meet.  Then we wrap around each other again and
again.  It never works out.  There’s always a fight.  There’s this woman who
asks, Who do you think you are?  There’s this man who says, You are the only
woman who exists.  (Men are like that, yes?)  He tells such lies.

Me?  I slink away with my hands in my head.  Or is it the other way?  I get lost
doing the simplest tasks. Drinking tea, climbing the steps, having sex.  (Am I
the only one who forgets which is which or what’s next?)  I remember now.
There’s a bicycle leaning against the house.  Whoever knocks, I say, Come on in.

 

 


In the Dark Room  

The year I was diagnosed as a manic depressive,
sliding down so suddenly, I scared people,

I was only a girl.
Fuck you, I said to anyone who asked
how I was.  Fuck you too.
It sounded cool.
After a while no one bothered me.
My mother said it was genetic.
Uncle Bill stepped in front of a train.
Cousin Joe got hooked on sedatives. 
Grandma Grace stayed inside
with the shades drawn
until she was cured with shock treatments.
Doctors electrically deleted her memories
and dreams.  She came home smiling
every time.  If a therapist asked
what her problem was,
she had no clue.
The last time she went in,
she said she found God in the asylum,
but He wasn’t very nice.

 

 

 

 

Grief

Sometimes I think I shouldn’t think what I think. 
Or dream.  Like last night I saw our girl
coming out of a tub. You wrapped her  
in a huge bath towel and combed her black hair back, 
took her outside past the pawpaw patch 
to the pond where blood suckers swim.  
The two of you walked so slowly beneath the full moon.  
You said you were in no mood to talk about what has passed.  
There is too much catching up for any two people to do.  
And besides it’s over now like old news.  
I’d be sorry if I ever really knew what I knew.  




Nin Andrews next book, Southern Comfort, will be published in October, 2009, by CavanKerry Press.  Her new chapbook, the Accidental Seduction, will be published in a very limited edition in November, 2009 by Obscure Publications.  The poems in this issue of Scapegoat are from The Accidental Seduction.


Scapegoat Review Fall 2009

Summer is a time of growth, fall, a time of harvest and reaping  Cycles— death then life will begin again. I've been consumed with Paul Celan, his search for ways out of pain, his longing for normalcy, wanting human connections, his anger, visions of death, and always haunting beauty. His language is passionate
and speaks for the dead, the living, the dying and unborn. I cannot read him without feeling like I am drowning with moments coming out of the waves to breathe. A good feeling? Yes, because, without pain, there is no pleasure. Reminders of suffering are important in order to feel alive, to see a flower and understand its beauty, its meaning.  Sometimes, I need a break, however. My mind is filled with counting the dead, the unsaid, silence and aurulent moons.

In celebration of fall, here's a poem Celan wrote based on Rilke's "Autumn Day"


Corona

Autumn eats its leaf out of my hand: we are friends.
From the nuts we shell time and we teach it to walk:
then time returns to the shell.

In the mirror it's Sunday,
in dream there is room for sleeping,
our mouths speak the truth.

My eye moves down to the sex of my loved one:
we look at each other,
we exchange dark words,
we love each other like poppy and recollection,
we sleep like wine in the conches,
like the sea in the moons blood ray.

We stand by the window embracing, and people
look up from the street:
it is time they knew!
It is time the stone made an effort to flower,
time unrest had a beating heart.
It is time it were time.

It is time.

Translated by Michael Hamburger


Autumn Day

Lord: it is time. The huge summer has gone by.
Now overlap the sundials with your shadows,
and on the meadows let the wind go free.  

Command the fruits to swell on tree and vine;
grant them a few more warm transparent days,
urge them on to fulfillment then, and press
the final sweetness into the heavy wine.  

Whoever has no house now, will never have one.
Whoever is alone will stay alone,
will sit, read, write long letters through the evening,
and wander along the boulevards, up and down,
restlessly, while the dry leaves are blowing.

Rainer Maria Rilke
Translated by Stephen Mitchell


Here's my version of "Corona"

Blackness Slips Through Sundays 

A mirror cannot speak truth

Just as a woman’s face masks
a madness

The man in the mug shot
Could be anyone’s husband, friend, father, —

The woman hides behind 
fiction 

First published in failbetter


This issue of Scapegoat Review is full of surprises; rogue waves (one of my favorite subjects, it's the super geek in me), conflicts with master, nightmares, the moment before waking, dark rooms, pigs, clouds, wrists and ankles bound.

Poetry by Nin Andrews, Sally Ashton, J.P. Dancing J. Hope Stein, Haiku by Tiberius F, poetry and flash fiction by Alexandra Isacson, and a Photo Essay by Louis Seigal.

I would like to thank Nin Andrews for sending her poems from the forthcoming Accidental Seduction.  Reading her poems are like sitting down for an afternoon without knowing anything about the direction you are taking. Sometimes you will double over with laughter, sometimes cry silently, other times, be unsure of what you feel until later in the night, but they will never leave you.

Experiencing Nin's work, is not only a pleasure, I want to savor each poem.  She has a rare gift; the ability to take us on a journey which never bores, brings forth emotions of pure joy, anguish, remembrance, and letting go of things we didn't know we were still holding onto.

She uses language as a tool which guides us down treacherous paths, gently holding our hands, so that we safely enter the world once again.

I want to thank all those who are in this issue. Autumn is a time of renewal, and looking toward winter, I am thrilled to let you know that the winter issue will be in magazine form.  Details to follow. 

Thank you

Erika



  sq1

sq3
© 2009 Louis Seigal

Poetry

   

Nin Andrews
Nice Pig
In the Operating Room
The Afterlife
In the Dark Room
Grief


Sally Ashton
Lizard
I wait for a rogue wave
How To


J. P. Dancing Bear
Gacela of the Inner Givens
Gacela of a Redwing Blackbird
The Moment Before Waking

 

Tiberius F
Where The Board Walk Ends


Alexandra Isacson
The Nightmare

J. Hope Stein
SOMEWHERE BETWEEN

CONFLICTS WITH MASTER #1

ADDIE POLK, 90

MARVIN SCHUR



Flash Fiction


 
Photo Essay




Alexandra Isacson
Electra’s Stockings
Carmel by the Sea
  Louis Seigal & Erika Lutzner
Convertible Deliberations